


Undefinable

by casey_sms (shinygreenwords), shinygreenwords



Category: The Social Network
Genre: Angst, Community:tsn_kinkmeme, Established Relationship, Fluff, Foreign Language, Language Kink, M/M, Romance, Schmoop, Translation Available, 中文翻译 | Translation in Chinese
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-29
Updated: 2010-12-29
Packaged: 2017-10-14 05:07:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/145692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinygreenwords/pseuds/casey_sms, https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinygreenwords/pseuds/shinygreenwords
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes Eduardo finds it hard to translate what he wants to say. Mark understands anyway.</p><p>For <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/tsn_kinkmeme/390.html?thread=350342#t350342">this prompt</a> at <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/tsn_kinkmeme/profile"><img/></a><a href="http://community.livejournal.com/tsn_kinkmeme/"></a><b>tsn_kinkmeme</b>: "I just want to read something with Eduardo speaking Portuguese."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Undefinable

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t actually know Portuguese. I kind of want to now but alas I’m making do with Google translate so if it’s dodgy, that’s why. Set during college, pre-FB success. Schmoop ahead. Established relationship. Implied sex but no actual sex.
> 
> There is a [**Chinese translation**](http://slash-ruo.blogbus.com/logs/97010302.html) available with much thanks to [ruoecliss](http://ruoecliss.livejournal.com/).

Mark is lying in the circle of Eduardo’s arms and it is wonderful. Eduardo can feel the warmth of Mark’s skin against his. He snuggles over so he could see his lover up close. The way it was different from his. Mark burns and peels spectacularly. Eduardo just tans. Mark had freckles randomly over his body. Eduardo’s pale skin was smooth.

Mark doesn’t care if it makes him sound needy. He wants them to stay like this forever but Eduardo says no, no his father wouldn’t understand. He tries to understand, for Eduardo, he really does but he just doesn’t seem to be able to grasp what kind of power his father has over him. Eduardo is nineteen, he has a scholarship, good grades, money and he doesn’t even live with his father anymore. But Eduardo told Mark that he just couldn’t, his eyes begged him to drop the subject so Mark didn’t say anything else. Eduardo tells him how much he means to him and Mark tries not to feel hurt. Mark wants to tell him that things could change, maybe, somehow because tonight is different. Instead Mark watches Eduardo breathe and commits the image of him to his memory. Just in case.

“What are you thinking about?” Eduardo asks.

“You,” he replies immediately. Mark loves the way Eduardo speaks, his accent is not quite American but not completely Brazilian. There is the hint of something foreign and yet familiar. Warm.

“Teach me some words in Portuguese.”

“Okay,” he murmurs. Mark often asks him and Eduardo feels embarrassed about it because he doesn’t really use it much except to speak with his parents and grandparents. “What you want to learn?”

“How do you say ‘hi’ again?”

“Oi.”

“It sounds kind of rude,” Mark says.

“That’s because you’re thinking in English,” Eduardo says with a laugh.

“Fine, how do you say something like ‘where can I buy a dildo’?”

Eduardo gives Mark a look but he complies. “Onde posso comprar um vibrador?”

“Sexy. Obrigado?”

It’s close enough but he corrects Mark anyway. It’s more a short ‘or’ sound than an ‘oh’ sound. Eduardo loves the way Mark would try out the sounds. It is beautiful.

“Speak to me in your language,” Mark demands.

Our language, Eduardo wants to tell Mark. This is something he shares with Mark and no one else. It’s different when it’s with Mark. It’s like he can say anything and he knows Mark won’t judge him. It’s not just that Mark doesn’t know or care about whether his Portuguese has an American accent. It’s that Mark looks at him like every word he says is divine. It’s a humbling experience. So he does as Mark asks. He tells Mark about how he wishes things could be different, how he thinks of Mark all the time and how he wishes he could be a braver person. How he wishes he could be the person that Mark sees. He gets so caught up that he doesn’t think about how he has to use other words, inferior, lesser words because his grasp of Portuguese is not as extensive as he’s like it to be. He catches himself in the middle of a description, stopping abruptly, suddenly conscious about being the only one talking. Usually it’s the other way around.

“Keep going,” Mark pleads, pulling Eduardo closer so he can rest his forehead against his. Eduardo can feel his breath puffing on his face and he unconsciously matches Mark’s inhales and exhales.

Eduardo marvels at the way that Mark seems to understand, brushing the curly strands of hair behind Mark’s ear as he tries to hide the emotions that always come with the story of how he met Mark and fell in love with him. He tries to fool Mark but Mark always knows when Eduardo is talking about him.

“You can tell me anything,” Mark would tell him with an earnest look.

He’s never felt anything like this before. For anyone. Mark always speaks his mind and he loves that about him. It was Mark that sought him out, Eduardo became his study partner, his friend, his business associate, his confidante and now his lover. He wants more than anything to show him to his father because Mark deserves it but he knows he has to keep it secret. At least for a while longer. His parents weren’t going to be happy with Mark because a) he is not female so he won’t be able to continue the family line and b) his father would start going on about how Mark is just using him. Eduardo knows Mark isn’t like that and they aren’t doing something dirty. He’d shared himself with Mark in a way that they wouldn’t understand. It isn’t any of their business. Mark was his first and he was Mark’s first. They did it together and it was something more than sex, it was about trust and being open with each other.

He doesn’t want to have to justify everything because it is just...right. Yet he hates having to meet in secret because Mark could do so much better. Mark is smart and brilliant and he’s going to be the CEO of a successful company one day. Eduardo would be happy just to be his friend. Mark promises him whether he is his CFO or chief advisor, they will do it together. I don’t want to do it without you, Mark said in a quick breath. Eduardo knew what he meant and he’d kissed him. To seal the deal, he said later. Mark had smiled.

Mark is calling out his name. “Wardo, are you crying?”

His instinct is to bury his face in his hair and mumble, “No.”

Mark understands anyway and lets Eduardo hide from the world until the soundless shakes had stopped somewhat.

 _Eu te amo mais do que palavras podem expressar._ He doesn’t know why he’s whispering and there is this lump in his throat.

He could see Mark’s eyes widen. They were the color of the sea – the kind of color between shades. A blue-green. The intensity of the moment seems to burn itself in his throat.

“What does it mean?” Mark asks when Eduardo looks away and started tracing shapes on the pillow. Mark slides his pale hand into his, leisurely lacing their fingers together.

He can feel himself blush. “It–It means...Um…I-I don’t know. Like I can’t…” I don’t know how to tell you, he thinks frantically. What is the right word to use? It’s not something he can really define. Recalling his translation class, he goes for the dynamic translation when the direct interpretation cannot accurately capture the meaning. He clears his throat. It means please stay. It means forever. It means I’m sorry. It means forgivemepleasedon’tgiveuponme...“It means I love you.” _I love you more than words can express._

And when Mark bids him to say it again and again, he repeats it quietly until Mark doesn’t need the translation any more, making the moment last just that little bit longer.


End file.
